President Cthulhu

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Many have participated in the humorous Cthulhu Presidential campaigns the last few election cycles. But have any ever gone so far to imagine what a Cthulhu administration would actually look like? The answer is yes. An online search turns up a few excellent depictions of how President Cthulhu would likely run things. For everyone but Cthulhu and other select Great Old Ones, it would not be pretty. Perhaps the poster above, colorfully playing off Barrack Obama's popular campaign art, says it best. A Cthulhu administration would deliver the elitism, special interests, and bizarre scandals other politicians try to disguise.

However, as the latter two images reveal, a Cthulhu Presidency wouldn't be all bad. We might finally see the worst of the lobbyists mopped up as an appetizer for Azathoth's High Priest. And there can be no doubt about the shock and awe President Cthulhu would inject into Washington. The deadlocked, unpopular Congress would surely be overturned. Nor would President Cthulhu hesitate to use the Veto--with the pen or his massive trans-dimensional tentacles.

Somehow, though, I suspect the American Presidency isn't enough for Cthulhu. When your only handicap to inconceivable power is the alignment of the heavens, then you ought to aspire to nothing less than a good segment of the universe, even if it's all for the Glory of Azathoth in the end.

Whatever the election cycle, you can pick up your Cthulhu for President T-shirt here. Wear it to the gatherings of the opposition parties, and let them know who can truly bridge the partisan divide. More eldritch news from the 2008 campaign is available here: On the Campaign Trail with Cthulhu.

-Grim Blogger

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